I can not believe that it is only Tuesday. This week has been very tumultuous so far. Hmmm, I like that... Tumultuous Tuesdays. This is my week in a nutshell:
Monday afternoon - email from my mom about a possible job position on the base here. It's working for the same company I worked for BEFORE we got posted here, the same one that didn't have any open positions for me when we moved, now they have 2 positions. My old co-worker (who is now the boss lady) emailed my mom, and asked her if I would be interested. So I emailed her back and said yes, possibly and that I needed more details.
Cue Tuesday morning - heard back from her. There are two positions, one term position for 5 months for posting season (it's the relocation department), and one permanent part time position that is full time for 5 months and then 20 hours/week until posting season rolls around next year. Then I freak out. Because that means if I got EITHER position, Nora goes into full time daycare for 5 months. And cue the Mom Guilt. That means I miss out on SO much, her first steps, her first real words, ugh, it makes me want to cry. But it also means, making quite a bit of money - enough money to make childcare worth it. And enough money to pay off our car.
Tuesday afternoon rolls around - Nora had her 9 month well baby check up today. And she failed. Or I failed. Either way, it didn't go well. Nora only weighs 17.2 lbs. She was 16.6 at her last appointment 3 months ago - and she is now in the 9th percentile for weight and the Dr. is concerned. So Nora is being referred to a pediatrician. Cue more Mom Guilt. We feed her when she's hungry. She eats quite a bit. She's a very normal baby, she's ahead of the curve on several of her "milestones". She's just little. I was very little. Paul was little. But they are worried. UGH.
And then we talked to Paul's sister and got more bad news (but I'm not going to discuss it on my blog because it's her personal life, not mine to talk about).
On a perk - I spent $63 at the grocery store today, and that's for 2 weeks worth of groceries including buying a bunch of jarred baby food meat. Which smells gross and I don't blame Nora for not wanting to eat it. I wouldn't eat it either. We mixed it with applesauce lol.
Another perk - I was visiting a friend of mine this evening on my walk with Nora and she offered child care to me. Which is AWESOME. She would charge me less and be flexible with our weird schedule because in June/July, my parents and Paul's parents are both coming out for approx 1 week and they probably won't be the same week, so Nora would be out of daycare for that. Also, Paul has the month of August off of work, so Nora would stay home with him then. So really we need childcare for May, June, July and September if I get the job. I'm SO TORN... I really don't know what to do. Any advice blog world????
I'd take the job. Granted, I don't have children, but if it is a sweet offer and I am ready to work again, then I have to understand that my baby is going to grow up.. with or without me. Unfortunately. :/ Sorry about all the bad news though girl.. try and not feel guilty about Nora. Sometimes doctors just stress you out over something that is normal in her case.
ReplyDeletehahaha, you should meet my niece. she'll be two next month, and finally joined the bottom of the growth chart :) skinniest kid you;ve ever seen, and eats more than an adult. There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with your daughter. she's perfect. and so are you. you're a wonderful loving mother. Working full time for 5 months isn't something to feel guilty about. I would feel guilty if io was one of the moms who who couldn't wait to go back to work to get some time away from my kid. you're amazing, don't be hard on yourself. Pee Ess... see you in July??
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